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Parshat Vayishlach- 5780 "Finding Lavan in all the Wrong Places"

Finding Lavan in All the Wrong Places
Vayishlach – 5780
Rabbi Shaanan Gelman (With Rabbi Ariel Rackovsky)

This has been a difficult week for klal Yisrael. Three more Jews have been added to the ever-growing list of martyrs, this time in a kosher supermarket in Jersey City.   When we heard about the murders of Leah Mindel Ferencz, the owner, as well as Moshe Deutsch, Chava Gold, along with Miguel Douglas Rodriguez, and Officer Joseph Seales, many of us hoped that it was a random attack, one not targeting Jews specifically.  We hoped, in vain, that this was somehow different than the Hyper Kasher supermarket in Paris or the Tree of Life Synagogue.  We hoped but we were wrong.  

Where do we go from here? What is the response of the Jew who discovers that he is constantly under attack?


We have one such example at the very beginning of the week’s Parsha. In preparation for his fateful reunion with his twin brother Esav, Yaakov sends messengers- actual angels, according to some interpreters- to relay a message to him. 

וַיְצַ֤ו אֹתָם֙ לֵאמֹ֔ר כֹּ֣ה תֹאמְר֔וּן לַֽאדֹנִ֖י לְעֵשָׂ֑ו כֹּ֤ה אָמַר֙ עַבְדְּךָ֣ יַעֲקֹ֔ב עִם־לָבָ֣ן גַּ֔רְתִּי וָאֵחַ֖ר עַד־עָֽתָּה׃
“Thus shall you say, ‘To my lord Esau, thus says your servant Jacob: I stayed with Laban and remained until now;
This seems like a pretty straightforward message - Yaakov wants Esav to know what he has been up to recently, where he has been living, and why it took so long to get to this place. 
But Rashi cites an interesting and somewhat bizarre midrash on the words   “עם לבן גרתי”:
עם לבן גרתי, ותרי"ג מצוות שמרתי
I have been living with Lavan, and I have observed the 613 commandments this entire time. 
The midrash is based upon the fact that the word גרתי is an anagram of the letters תרי”ג, whose numeric equivalent is 613.  This is a cute example of wordplay but it is difficult to understand what would motivate Yaakov to send such a message. Leaving aside the obvious and well documented question of how Yaakov could possibly have observed all 613 commandments, or how he could do so while being married to sisters, why would Esav care that Yaakov remained observant? Imagine the hatred Esav is harboring in his heart over the stolen blessings, the years of neglect and enmity piling up in a sibling relationship that turned toxic. Why would he be pacified with the knowledge that Yaakov sent away a mother bird before taking the chicks, or that he built a parapet around his roof, or that he left a corner of his field unharvested for the benefit of the poor, and that he scrupulously avoided negative speech? Why would Esav care, and why would this knowledge prevent him from seeking vengeance ?  


I’d like to suggest that Yaakov’s message is not conciliatory; he is not telling Esav about his frumkeit because he believes Esav will care. He is telling him about the Taryag mitzvos because he needs to hear himself say those words- that he is unabashedly proud about who he is and the kind of life he lives, and that he knows it’s the only way to counter those who seek our destruction. Esav may attempt to throw stones, to shoot up grocery stores, to threaten our physical safety, but he will never win so long as the Jews are still keeping the 613 commandments. 



When we are confronted with anti-Semitism- and we are, increasingly so; the FBI reports taht 57.8% of all religiously motivated hate crimes in the US have been against Jews in 2019- there are two ways we typically respond. The first is to downplay the extent of the anti-Semitism:  When we heard about the shootout in Jersey City, we were quick to cling to the initial reports that indicated that this had nothing to do with Jews, and that the kosher store was in the wrong place at the wrong time. How wrong we were. And once we knew that the store was targeted, how many of us held onto hopes that the identity of the perpetrator conformed to a certain preconceived image of who are today’s anti-Semites? 

The second impulse is to downplay our Judaism in the face of the threat it represents. This is the safest play of all; after all, if I am targeted because of my religion, the prudent thing to do is mask it .  And so, it’s only natural to try and hide your Judaism. Yaakov does the opposite; instead of wearing a baseball hat on the plane and going to sleep, he puts on tefillin as soon as it reaches cruising altitude! 

Here is the frightening reality. Esav Sonei Et Yaakov . Our sages, when they said this, did not mean that this is a rational reaction; instead, they were cautioning us that no political ideology and no religious affiliation represents a safe harbor for Jews- not liberals and not conservatives, not Evangelical Christians and not moderate Moslems. There is no group that won’t turn against us even if they profess friendship, given the right conditions. And while it is important to communicate with Esav, and to foster good relations with our neighbors, we mustn’t allow ourselves to be lulled into a false sense of security that we can consistently rely on anyone’s support or friendship. So, what can we rely upon? There is only one guarantee that preserves our identity as Yaakov’s children. It is the strict observance of mitzvos.
Maybe the alarming increase in anti-Semitic events worldwide is the “knock” that Rav Soloveitchik spoke about in Kol Dodi Dofek, the knock that tells us its time to pack our bags and make aliyah. Some will say that I’m delusional in prefacing that sentence with the word “maybe.” The Jewish future is not here in galus; it is in the land of Israel. Notwithstanding that larger goal, when we consider what must be done to preserve Judaism wherever we are, to ensure its continuity, we often think about religious ideologies. Where is the future of Judaism? Is it in liberal movements of Judaism or Chareidi expressions, neo-chassidus, post denominational or Modern Orthodoxy?  I’m sure that everyone in this room has a different conception as to where the ideological future lies, quite aside from our geographical future.  But what we cannot forget is that the real future of Judaism rests in the pure observance of mitzvos, and the strict adherence to halacha- not in whatever external expression that happens to feel right to a select group. 

You may have heard of a woman named Bracha “Beatie” Deutsch; she is making the headlines as of late, as a world class marathon runner. She is an olah who began running to stay in shape as a mother of five.  She never ran a race in her life, but within three years of training, she was already competing in and winning international marathons. Most remarkably, she is a deeply observant woman who identifies with the chareidi community, running races in a long sleeved top, a head scarf and a skirt that extends below her knees.  She was quoted in Runner’s World magazine as saying: 

“I’m proud that I can still pursue my dreams without sacrificing my values.”

Well, those values are now being put to test. Her dream of representing Israel at the 2020 Tokyo Olympics seemed like a foregone conclusion, until she discovered something unsettling, which prompted the following post:

I felt like I was punched in the stomach this morning… but the truth is I'm more than OK. I wasn't sure if I should share the news with all of you right now, but I've brought you along on my journey this far. Today I found out that the Olympic marathon date has been switched to Shabbos…
I may not make it to the Olympics... I may not make the standard or I may not be able to run a race that is on Shabbat But one thing I do know is that I will continue to proudly represent what it means to be an Orthodox Jewish woman and professional runner for Israel.
This is what Yaakov meant. 
עם לבן גרתי….ותרי"ג מצוות שמרתי
Wherever I go, I will never compromise on my identity as a shomer Torah Umitzvot. 
Tell your kids tonight, right after havdalah to take down the posters of Lebron James, Tom Brady and Serena Williams-and to put up a picture of Beatie Deutsch instead.  May we never hear such tragic news again, but if it ever occurs that someone calls out to destroy the Jewish people  - reaffirm your connection to a Torah life. 

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